Kream 'N' Kone.

Remember when McPickles told you that she'd have a food post for those of you afraid/unwilling/allergic to creatures of the sea?

This isn't it.

Actually, if you care about your body at all, you might want to skip this post.

(Are they gone now?)

You made the right call. Are you seriously going to turn down "The Finest Fried Seafood Anywhere"? Didn't think so.

Don't get me wrong, it's kinda gross. And offensive to anyone with a desire or ability to participate in the rules of grammar. Once you're over that, this place is delightful. There's one in Chatham, which is dingier than the other one somewhere down Route 28 (I scoured for photos of the Chatham exterior and I've come to the conclusion that the "Kream 'N' Kone" executives have scrubbed the internets clean of any and all such images. To be fair, they're all potentially damaging).

Now, I realize I just tossed out some aggressive language that would scare most people off. But tell you what, if you're looking for a plate of fried sea critters, look no further. They'll give you shrimp, fish, scallops, oysters and clams (Are you eating strips? Really? Get the belly, dude.) all stacked together on a bed of fries and onion rings. Sure, they won't win any points on Iron Chef for creativity or, God forbid, plating (it's all one hue). But boy does it look golden brown and taste fried.

Get the ketchup, vinegar and extra tartar sauce ready, it's on!

Also, I guess they have ice cream (hence the "Kone", but I never bother).

Look who's back.